When I became a horror artist

I'm a planner. That means, if I have a trip coming up, or maybe a wedding in a year, I will be spending time planning. And guess what - I have a trip and wedding to plan! I'm still doing art, which you can see on Instagram or Facebook, but I don't have any major updates right now.

Today's newsletter is from the drafts. I thought I'd give some very brief insight into how I started making the work I do today. I personally find artist bios and backstories really cringey, so hopefully I don't induce that same feeling in you!

Here is my origin story (sort of).

Childhood and High School

Like all children, I drew. I’m sure I drew all sorts of pretty things, but I remember drawing the widow’s peak on a classic vampire over and over. In High School art, it was mandatory to paint, and my first original works were inspired by the book Eve, an autobiography by Chris Costner-Sizemore who was diagnosed with multiple personality disorder in the 1950s*. Some of these works can be seen in the Archive.

University

I later went to university to study Fine Arts, thinking that this would be an opportunity to learn some practical skills that would allow me to execute my ideas into artwork, while also providing some industry knowledge to make art a career. Unfortunately, the Fine Arts degree I completed in 2013 was more about thinking conceptually – an important and valuable skill, but I didn’t acquire what I really needed and wanted. I still consider myself self-taught when it comes to painting.

After university

The artwork I created during and for a few years after university was quantity over quality. I felt I “should” be creating a lot, I “should” be doing large artworks, I “should” be doing exhibitions. Only a few select pieces from this time have made it to my Archive.

Becoming a horror artist

It took until 2018 to realise that I should just do what I wanted. I dropped the fantasy and sci-fi art** to focus on horror. I put oil paints back into my drawer so I could do smaller, more manageable watercolours which I very much enjoy. This is when I feel I became a horror artist and the “real” Cross-Eyed Morgan*** was born, though I’ve used that name for much longer.

Now, I create horror watercolours that excite me. There is something about horror as a genre; most people either seem to really relate to it, or they just don’t. I can’t put my finger on why, but the images I create bring me a strange comfort, and I hope it does the same for you. Plus, they just look cool.

Footnotes

*The diagnosis was called multiple personality disorder at the time; it is now known as dissociative identity disorder. Professionals have disagreement on the validity this disorder and it may seem in conflict with my position as a skeptic. I am not a medical professional, so I offer no opinion on this. All I can say is that, artistically, at the time, this book had a major impact on me.

**I still love these genres! And of course, there is sometimes crossover with horror, so I still get to play with them every now and again. But one of the lovely things about art is that there are so many amazing artists; someone else can do those genres for me to enjoy.

***The name comes from a band I used to be in called Cross-Eyed Mary, who in turn got their name from the Jethro Tull song. The core members have recently re-formed-ish, check them out.